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The runaway success of “The Sound of Music” resulted in a blitzkrieg of movie musicals, nearly all of which failed to captivate audiences. The stinker that squashed the trend once and for all was this 1973 remake of a well-received 1937 film. Unfortunately, unlike the original, the ‘70s version missed the mark in nearly every way, beginning with its failed attempts at updating the mythological world of Shangri-La without overhauling its racist definition. The movie’s songs were so rotten that longtime writing partners Burt Bacharach and Hal David refused to work together afterwards. And the film tanked so hard at the box office that Columbia Pictures execs reportedly gave it the nickname “Lost Investment.” The movie is so universally panned that the only remaining debate seems to be whether it’s “so bad it’s good again” or just plain bad.-Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: Columbia Pictures) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
'At Long Last Lo...Forget movie musicals; this 1975 turkey is widely considered one of the worst films ever made, regardless of genre. Featuring Cybill Shepherd and Burt Reynolds, the movie was intended to serve as an homage to the classic musicals of the 1930s. Instead, it is the great example of what a musical should never aspire to be. It was blasted with negative reviews upon its release, with Esquire film critic John Simon claiming "it may be the worst movie musical of this--or any-- decade." The tidal wave of vitriol prompted director Peter Bogdanovich to write a press release to newspapers across America apologizing for his ghastly film. -Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: 20th Century Fox Films) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
‘From Justin to ...“American Idol” made no attempt to market this 2003 movie as anything other than a means of exploiting the newfound success of Kelly Clarkson and Justin Guarini, its Season One champ and runner-up, respectively. Noting the cheesy musical numbers strung together with a paper-thin plot and super-sloppy choreography, critics lambasted the film with an 8% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. The movie tanked at the box office as well, earning just $4.6 million on a $12 million budget. “’Moulin Rouge’ ... ‘Chicago’ ... ‘From Justin to Kelly’ ... two steps forward and then about 16 steps back for the film musical,” wrote the Austin Chronicle. When asked about why she agreed to participate in the schlockfest, Clarkson had this to say to Time magazine: "Two words: Contractually obligated!”-Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: 20th Century Fox Films) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
‘Glitter’This widely panned film not only nearly killed Mariah Carey’s career, but musicals as a whole. Carey’s vocal theatrics made the musical numbers palatable, the rest of the film sagged under the weight of its own clichés. Carey’s acting translated as if she were reading her lines off a card, and her co-star Max Beesley was so bad he essentially blackballed himself from any decent roles. Overall, the movie was a heroically epic failure. It’s a good thing ‘Chicago’ came along in 2002 to revive the genre.-Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: 20th Century Fox Films) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
‘Grease 2’Say what you will about the original “Grease,” this sorry sequel makes it look like “Singin’ in the Rain” by comparison. Its half-baked musical numbers are devoid of memorable melodies, most notably the song devoted to the joys of bowling (''Let's bowl, let's bowl, let's rock and roll''). There is also an utter lack of chemistry between romantic leads Maxwell Caulfield and Michelle Pfeiffer. Not even their role-reversal from the Olivia Newton-John/John Travolta storyline (Pfeiffer only wants to date a “cool rider”) can justify this gross re-hashing of the original.-Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: Paramount Pictures) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
‘The Jazz Singer...The original “The Jazz Singer” from 1927 was remarkable for two reasons. The first is that it was the first feature-length film with talking. The second is Al Jolson. This remake featuring Neil Diamond has neither of those factors going for it, and little else. Diamond is his usual polarizing self in the movie, which explains how he earned both a Golden Globe nomination for Best Actor and a Golden Raspberry nomination for worst (he won the latter). The movie’s best achievement was its soundtrack, which sold multiple millions of copies and remains Diamond’s most successful album. Beyond that, as Roger Ebert wrote, “’The Jazz Singer’ has so many things wrong with it that a review threatens to become a list.”-Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: EMI Films) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
‘Paint Your Wago...No one really wanted to see Clint Eastwood in a musical. And beyond that, no one wanted to see the man who played Dirty Harry in a scene where he walks through a forest all lonely-like and whimpers out a song called “It Talk to the Trees.” Put that in the context of an overblown, three-hour Hollywood production, and it’s easy to see why this musical is one that should have been left on the stage. -Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: Paramount Pictures) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
‘Dr. Dolittle’ (...Long before Eddie Murphy got his hands on the franchise, “Dr. Dolittle” was one of the most infamous bombs in not just movie musical history, but all of cinema. Film historian Leonard Maltin summed up the 1967 release succinctly as a “colossal dud.” "The movie has one merit,” he wrote. “If you have unruly children, it may put them to sleep." Terrible reviews and poor ticket sales (the film recouped barely half its budget) were blamed on the musical’s unexceptional score and the uninspired acting of lead Rex Harrison, who was reported to be such an uncooperative a terror during filming that he was temporarily replaced by Christopher Plummer. Perhaps they should have let him go.-Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: 20th Century Fox Films) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
‘Lost Horizon’ (...The runaway success of “The Sound of Music” resulted in a blitzkrieg of movie musicals, nearly all of which failed to captivate audiences. The stinker that squashed the trend once and for all was this 1973 remake of a well-received 1937 film. Unfortunately, unlike the original, the ‘70s version missed the mark in nearly every way, beginning with its failed attempts at updating the mythological world of Shangri-La without overhauling its racist definition. The movie’s songs were so rotten that longtime writing partners Burt Bacharach and Hal David refused to work together afterwards. And the film tanked so hard at the box office that Columbia Pictures execs reportedly gave it the nickname “Lost Investment.” The movie is so universally panned that the only remaining debate seems to be whether it’s “so bad it’s good again” or just plain bad.-Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: Columbia Pictures) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
‘Sextette’The only thing more awkward than watching a sex scene with your grandma in the room is watching a sex scene with your grandma in THAT room. That’s the feeling you get when watching this adaptation of a Broadway musical featuring an 84-year-old Mae West at her raunchiest. The octogenarian-sex-kitten act is old before it even begins. Audiences are asked to sit through numbers like the disco duet of “Love Will Keep Us Together” between West and her on-screen husband (a 32-year-old Timothy Dalton). Variety cut to the chase when it summarized the film as "a cruel, unnecessary and mostly unfunny musical comedy.”-Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: Crown International Pictures ) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
'Can't Stop the ...Steve Guttenberg? Bruce Jenner? What could go wrong? Well, everything. A pseudo-biography of the Village People, this musical comedy sadly debuted in 1980, about five minutes after the world decided it was done with disco – which was a shame, since the entire project was more or less a vehicle designed to capitalize on the Village People’s success. Saddled with a trio of lead actors who could neither sing nor dance and a sub-standard score of music no one wanted to hear, the movie crashed and burned. “It's tough to believe any movie that opens with Steve Guttenberg dancing on rollerskates could actually get worse from there, but it does -- and in such spectacular fashion!” wrote Philadelphia Weekly. The movie bears the distinction of being the very first recipient of the Golden Raspberry Awards’ Worst Picture and Worst Screenplay trophies. It was a commercial flop, as well, earning a tenth of what it cost to make.-Xfinity Entertainment Programmers
(Photo: EMI Films) The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
