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50 Cent would do a great job playing a character that is stuck in a coma. In that situation, his expressionless face would be perfectly appropriate. However, to the best of my understanding, his character of Curtis Jackson (aka 50 Cent) in “Get Rich or Die Tryin’” was not in a coma. Not when dealing drugs, not when being arrested, and not when getting shot nine times (although he might have been afterwards, I don’t remember). But you’d never know that from 50’s performance, which basically consisted of a series of scowls like the one you see above. When you have this much trouble playing yourself, perhaps acting is not the career choice for you. —Jeff Royer (Photo: Paramount Pictures)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Ain't Nothing Li...Elton John recently said he wanted Justin Timberlake to play him in an upcoming biopic. If that seems like an odd choice, don’t be too quick to judge. John could do a lot worse. These historical figures sure did. —Jeff Royer (Photos: Warner Bros. Pictures/RKO Radio Pictures/Orion Pictures)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Dennis Quaid as ...Quaid took to his role in “Great Balls of Fire” with an over-the-top, manic enthusiasm that completely distracted viewers from whatever redeeming qualities the film might have otherwise had. Adopting an exaggerated Southern yokel accent and flashing crazy eyes at every opportunity, Quaid managed to turn one of rock’s most complicated figures into a one-dimensional buffoon. —Jeff Royer (Photo: Orion Pictures)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
John Wayne as Ge...Wayne’s role as the founder of the Mongol Empire in “The Conqueror” is widely regarded as the worst piece of miscasting in cinema history. Few roles can compete with the awkwardness of seeing The Duke, not-really-disguised in a Fu Manchu and slanted eyebrows, spew lines like “I am Temujin, the Conqueror. No prison can hold me, no army defeat me” with essentially the same delivery he used in “True Grit.” —Jeff Royer (Photo: RKO Radio Pictures)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Colin Farrell as...The movie the New York Observer summed up as “a lunk-headed train wreck” was such a critical and commercial failure that Farrell nearly quit the business altogether. His performance in the film suggests that may have been a good idea. Encumbered by both an almost comical level of intensity and a complete lack of gravitas, Farrell’s Alexander comes across as less of a warrior king and more of a sexually ambiguous man-child in a terrible wig. —Jeff Royer (Photo: Warner Bros. Pictures)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Val Kilmer as Ji...Kilmer’s performance in 1991’s “The Doors” was panned as a lazy caricature of frontman Jim Morrison as a cartoonish alcohol and drug addict. Much of the blame for that goes to director Oliver Stone, whose overzealous pursuit of the ‘60s psychedelic vibe made Kilmer’s role seem, as TV Guide put it, “boring, indulgent and over-stuffed.” —Jeff Royer (Photo: TriStar Pictures)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Frederick Weller...This Emmy-nominated made-for-TV film “The Beach Boys: An American Family” is packed full of bloopers and blunders (you can see Mike Love’s mustache falling off during a bedroom scene with his wife), but none as egregious as Weller’s (above, middle) misplaying of mastermind Brian Wilson. Botched fat-man makeup aside, Wilson comes across as a goofy idiot savant (who actually gets a lesson on songwriting from Love – talk about revisionist history) with an almost comical dependency on junk food and drugs. —Jeff Royer (Photo: Columbia / TriStar Television)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Diana Ross as Bi...While her role in “Lady Sings the Blues” earned Ross an Oscar nomination for Best Actress, it also drew heavy criticism due to the strong injection of her own vocal and musical style into the part to the point where it began to feel like karaoke. The last thing the world needed was a breathy, disco-vibed version of Holiday that sacrifices jazzy nuance for syrupy pop immediacy. —Jeff Royer (Photo: Paramount Pictures)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Madonna as Eva P...Madonna gets points for trying, but not points for succeeding. The complaint against her portrayal of the First Lady of Argentina in “Evita” is not that she misplayed the character, but that she didn’t play it enough. She goes through the motions, but does so without kicking up any real emotional dust. Some believe Peron to be a saint, while others think she was something closer to a manipulative, opportunistic schemer who slept her way to the top; the one thing everyone agrees on was that she was a larger-than-life character who can’t be convincibly portrayed with a vacuous performance like Madonna’s. As Metroactive wrote of the pop star, “Her worst enemy couldn't have come up with a scheme to make her look more overblown, more arch-queenly, more completely free of any talent.” Ouch. —Jeff Royer (Photo: Hollywood Pictures)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Robert Pattinson...What was meant to be a stirring, incendiary gay coming-of-age tale melted into a puddle of soap opera-worthy schlock fest thanks to the “Twilight” star’s defanged performance in “Little Ashes.” He gets points for donning the absurd mustache without laughing, but loses plenty more for his thoroughly awkward and unconvincing attempt at playing a tortured artist, and still more for botching a Spanish accent. —Jeff Royer (Photo: PT Films)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Kevin Costner as...Costner takes all the blame here, as he was responsible for both casting and performing this mismatched role in “Thirteen Days,” which he produced. When he wasn’t busy dramatically frowning his way through the Cuban missile crisis, as he does for most of the film, Costner was busy bludgeoning audiences with one of the most curiously off-target accents in history, an over-exaggerated Boston inflection that sounds like a bad impression of a bad impression. —Jeff Royer (Photo: New Line Cinema)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Kevin Costner as...Kevin Costner can’t win. The only thing worse than his botched Boston accent in “Thirteen Days” was his complete lack of effort in “Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.” While every other character in the film sports the appropriate British accent, Costner made no attempt whatsoever to disguise the fact that he was, in fact, from California. Granted, this film stretches the definition of a true biopic, but couldn’t they have cast someone to play the heroic outlaw who was at least willing to try? —Jeff Royer (Photo: Warner Bros. Pictures)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
Nicolas Cage as ...The good news for Cage is that his portrayal of Canadian rowing champion Hanlan in “The Boy in Blue” was one of the finest performances of his career. The bad news is that it was one of the worst biopic performances in history, on account of his hammy delivery on an already saccharine role. To be fair, not even Daniel Day Lewis could pull off a line like “This is making me sick, wearing these monkey suits!” But it sounds so much worse coming from Ghost Rider. —Jeff Royer (Photo: CBC)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
50 Cent as 50 Ce...50 Cent would do a great job playing a character that is stuck in a coma. In that situation, his expressionless face would be perfectly appropriate. However, to the best of my understanding, his character of Curtis Jackson (aka 50 Cent) in “Get Rich or Die Tryin’” was not in a coma. Not when dealing drugs, not when being arrested, and not when getting shot nine times (although he might have been afterwards, I don’t remember). But you’d never know that from 50’s performance, which basically consisted of a series of scowls like the one you see above. When you have this much trouble playing yourself, perhaps acting is not the career choice for you. —Jeff Royer (Photo: Paramount Pictures)
The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.
