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"I am on a drug. It's called 'Charlie Sheen.' It's not available because if you try it once, you will die. Your face will melt off, and your children will weep over your exploded body. Too much?" (Photos: Frazer Harrison/Getty)
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All Aboard the C...Charlie Sheen has never been one to keep his mouth shut. The wacky actor's latest rant comes in response to his former "Two and a Half Men" co-star Angus T. Jones calling the show "filth" and begging fans not to watch anymore. Sheen likened Jones' statements to a "Hale-Bopp-like meltdown," in reference to the California-based Heaven's Gate cult that committed a mass suicide in the late 1990s. The actor went on to attack show creator Chuck Lorre. He told TMZ, "I dare anyone to spend ten years in the laugh-track that is Chuck Lorre's hive of oppression and not suffer some form of an emotional tsunami." Some things never change. Keep clicking for 25 more of Charlie's craziest quotes. —XFINITY Entertainment Staff (Photo by Kevork Djansezian/Getty Images
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On His Rumored D..."I am on a drug. It's called 'Charlie Sheen.' It's not available because if you try it once, you will die. Your face will melt off, and your children will weep over your exploded body. Too much?" (Photos: Frazer Harrison/Getty)
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In Response to P...“They were like ‘AA this’ and I was like ‘bye bye that'.” (Photo: Kevin Winter/Getty)
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On How He Avoids..."I just don’t do it. I will not believe that if I do something then I have to follow a certain path because it was written for normal people. People who aren’t special. People who don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA." (Photos: Getty Images)
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In Response to S...“Rock bottom? That’s a fishing term. Doesn’t Jimmy Buffett sing ‘Down to rock bottom again?’ Doesn’t he? Love me some Jimmy Buffett.” (Photos: Charley Gallay; Rick Diamon/Getty)
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On Wanting to Go..."I demand that these questions be answered, because until they are, we're just sitting there like Winnie the Pooh over there. That's how I feel. I am that happy. Look at that smile on his perfect face." (Photos: Vince Bucci; Michael Buckner/Getty)
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On the Possibili..."Whatever ... If they want me in it, it's a smash. If they don't, it's a turd that opens on a tugboat." (Photos: Universal; AP)
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On his Relations...“Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words -- imagine what I would have done with my fire-breathing fists.” (Photos: Frederick M. Brown; Dave Hogan/Getty)
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On His Romantic ...“News flash: I am special, and I will never be one of you. I’m going to hang out with these two smoking hotties and fly privately around the world. It might be lonely up here, but I sure like the view.” (Photo: AP)
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On His Self-Imag..."I’m tired of pretending I’m not a total b*****n’ rock star from Mars." (Photos: Jason Merritt/Getty; Universal)
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On Reportedly Be...“And then what, what's the cure? Medicine? Make me like them? Not gonna happen. I'm bi-winning -- I win here and I win there.” (Photo: Kevin Winter/Getty)
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On His Love of F...“If you’re a part of my family, I will love you violently.” (Photo: Michael Buckner/Getty)
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On Chuck Lorre ...."I spent close to the last decade effortlessly and magically converting your tin cans into pure gold. And the gratitude I get is this charlatan chose not to do his job, which is to write. Clearly someone who believes he's above the law." (Photo: Frederick M. Brown/Getty)
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On Being a Good ..."I believe that chivalry is not dead. It’s just been in a coma for a long time.” (Photo: Ethan Miller/Getty)
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On His New Rocks..."The run I was on made Sinatra, Jagger, Richards, all the others look like droopy-eyed, armless children. It was epic." (Photo: Riccardo S. Savi/Getty)
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On Allegations T...“I have a disease? B******t. I cured it with my brain.” (Photo: Frederick M. Brown/Getty)
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On Curing His Pr...“My success rate is 100 percent. Do the math!” (Photo: Kevork Djansezian/Getty)
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On His 'Live Lif..."There's a new sheriff in town. And he has an army of assassins." (Photo: AP)
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On Being a Major..."I have a grandiose life. I embrace it. Sorry my life is so much more b****in' than yours. I planned it this way." (Photo: AP)
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On the 'Two and ..."I'm insulted. I am confused. But these resentments, they are the rocket fuel that lives in the tip of my saber. Want to go to war. Let's go to war." (Photo: Kevin Winter/Getty)
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On Always Being ..."Every plan I have is the best plan in the room." (Photo: Patrick Riviere/Getty)
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On People Who Go..."Look what I'm dealing with, man. I'm dealing with fools and trolls." (Photo: Kevin Winter/Getty)
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On His Eight Yea..."An unwanted relative being given cold coffee at 9pm every night." (Photo: Mark Mainz/Getty)
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On Being Called ..."I was referring to Chuck by his real name, because I wanted to address the man, not the bulls**t TV persona. So you're telling me, anytime someone calls me Carlos Estevez, I can claim they are anti-Latino?" (Photo: Kevin Winter/Getty)
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Advice to the UC..."Stay off the crack. Drink chocolate milk." (Photo: Getty Images)
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On Whether He Ca..."Yeah, yeah, but that kinda blew up in my face ... like an exploding crack pipe." (Photo: Chris Weeks/Getty)
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