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LIFE.com: Dumb Celebrity Baby Names

Dumb Names Celebrities Give Their Kids

Why can't celebrities just pick regular old names like John and Susan like the rest of us? For whatever reason, they have to seemingly pluck the names of their newborns randomly from dictionaries or half-remembered nightmares. Perhaps they believe that their millions and celebrity status will protect their young ones from the inevitable schoolhouse teasing. Or perhaps they believe the adversity can only make their kids stronger. Either way, we get to enjoy the feeling -- if just for the length of a slideshow -- that sometimes average Joes and Janes like us have made much better decisions in life than the stars of stage and screen. Like rocker Frank Zappa (here with parents Rose Marie and Francis), who infamously dubbed his kids Moon Unit, Dweezil, Ahmet Emuukha Rodan and Diva Thin Muffin Pigeen. (John Olson/Time and Life Pictures/Getty Images/LIFE.com)
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The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.

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