Funny or Die’s ‘Black Women Run Hollywood,’ ‘Today’s’ De-Clutter Tips & More

by | June 16, 2014 at 7:26 PM | Black Entertainment, Can't Stop Watching, Oprah's Next Chapter, The Today Show

"Black Women Run Hollywood" (Image: Funny or Die)

Happy Monday! Here’s what’s happening today: People are buzzing about Funny or Die’s exclusive short “Black Women Run Hollywood,” see the other Funny or Die exclusive and the “Today” show reveals helpful tips for keeping your home in order. Plus, there’s my watchlist and what’s hot (Malia Obama working on a TV show set) and not (that Change.org petition about Blue Ivy Carter’s hair). Enjoy!
(Sista-)Girls run the world? You know how everyone’s been going on about how we’re in this Golden Age for Black Hollywood and how more black actresses are returning to TV to strike it big like Kerry Washington on “Scandal”? Well, all that talk has caught the attention of some creatives who decided to address “the greatest secret in all of Hollywood” on the best forum available: FunnyorDie.com. “Black Women Run Hollywood” is an exclusive 5-minute short starring several Black actresses that spotlights the limited roles black women have had in Tinseltown over the past century. But did you know the maid and slave portrayals that Hattie McDaniel, Butterfly McQueen, Juanita Moore and yes, even, girl-of-the-moment Lupita Nyong’o (and Jennifer Hudson in “Sex and the City”–C’mon, that was Mammy 2.0) were all done by design? ”We have been flying under the radar, darling, to maintain complete control,” explains Oscar-nominated actress Alfre Woodard, head of a secret coven of sista stars who really call the shots in Hollywood. She was relaying that message to newly indoctrinated starlet Jurnee Smollett. Seconds later, three white male filmmakers appear in the dungeon, asking whether they should direct a film for Alfre, who shouts, “Not now!,” tossing them a slop of uncooked “grass fed” ground chuck. “We traded credit for freedom and control,” says Emmy Award-winner Loretta Devine, also a coven member. Tracee Ellis Ross, Meagan Good, Nicole Byer and Retta also star in this spoof.  Despite their efforts,  Jurnee’s still unconvinced. So Tracee steps in to explain: ”Think about it Jurnee, if you control the media, you control the world.” Ding, ding, ding! Jurnee still wasn’t buying it but as a viewer, I got it. Even though black men and black women have made tremendous strides in Hollywood, it’s completely unbalanced when compared to their white counterparts. Sure, things are changing, but the limitations continue to exist. Just ask any Hollywood actress or watch the “Oprah’s Next Chapter” episode featuring successful talents Viola Davis, Phylicia Rashad, Gabrielle Union and yes, Alfre, too, discussing the hurdles they and others had to face. Overall, I think “Black Women Run Hollywood” is OK. There were some moments that made me chuckle and others I think could’ve been written with more humor and wittiness. I do like that the topic was addressed, even in satire. I just hope Hollywood decision-makers realize the folly in their limited thinking and allow more fluid roles for black women and black men to be shown. We aren’t a monolith though I agree with this jewel Alfre dropped from the short: “Remember, when black women stick together, we are the most powerful force in the universe.” Amen. I don’t want to give away the whole video for you. Check it out here and tell me what you think.     
‘Memba this Funny or Die video?! Watching “Black Women Run Hollywood” reminded me of another video featured on “Funny or Die” three years ago that I thought was funny. It’s “Black Best Friend” and stars “Parks & Recreation” writer Aisha Muharrar and Casey Wilson, who’s best known for starring in ABC’s “Happy Endings.” Check it out below.

Clean or Clutter? Hey, summer may begin Saturday, but it’s not too late for you to spring clean. The “Today” show’s Hoda Kotb and Kathie Lee Gifford talked to experts about what being a complete slob or an anal neatfreak says about you. Depending on what I have going on, I can lean more toward one extreme than the other. I honestly love having things organized. The chi just flows and I feel and function better. Sadly, it doesn’t always last (especially if I’m on deadline or working on a writing project. Papers are everywhere, as Kathie Lee mentioned). The suggestions offered were helpful though I would’ve liked to have learned more. I found one thing to be true when cleaning: start small. I often make a list and prioritize what should be done, breaking each project down as minutely as possible. I cross off the completed task and move to the next. It helps eliminate the overwhelming feeling and gives me the assurance to move on (don’t judge).  For example, I cleaned out my fridge very early this morning and felt good. I was so proud that you would’ve thought I climbed Mt. Everest. Give it a try. Learn more below.    

On my watchlist? What I’m tuning in to see and what I’ll catch up with XFINITY On Demand…
“Murder in the First”: After last week’s series premiere, I’m still curious. It airs tonight at 10 p.m. EST on TNT. Check out the overview below and learn more about the new series here.

The Hot List: Who/What’s Hot, Not
HOT: First daughter Malia Obama, who’ll be 16 soon, working on the set of Halle Berry’s forthcoming CBS show “Extant” (Not bad for a first gig. Not bad at all.).
NOT: The Change.org petition created about Beyonce Knowles and Jay Z’s daughter Blue Ivy’s hair (This is a little girl who will be of reading age in a few years. Just give her the complexes y’all got…)

HOT: The photo of Kanye West and his 1-year-old daughter, North, asleep (Aww…).
NOT: Twenty-seven people being shot in Chicago over Father’s Day Weekend (Very unfortunate. Honestly, I noted how quiet, serene and beautiful the city seemed to me Sunday evening.).

The opinions expressed are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Comcast.