‘The Vampire Diaries’: Elena’s Cheerful Rampage

by | March 15, 2013 at 9:07 AM | Recap, Vampire Diaries

"The Vampire Diaries": Nina Dobrev as Elena and Paul Wesley as Stefan (Annette Brown/The CW)

For weeks we have waited to see humanity- free Elena wreak havoc as an evil cheerleader on “The Vampire Diaries.” It turns out that she is more Mean Girl than psychopath, which makes”Bring It On” a sightly anti-climactic episode. On the other hand, two new ships are born. Read below for their portmaneaus and the highlights.

Elena Wants a Cheerocracy, Not a Cheertatorship: It’s a couple days after Elena (Nina Dobrev) switched off her humanity.  The vampires of Mystic Falls are starving because, thanks to the vervaine in the water supply, none of the town’s humans are a suitable snack. On the outskirts of town, Elena fakes being run over by a car so she can bite the panicked driver. Damon (Ian Somerhalder) reminds her she promised not to kill anyone. Blood running down her chin, she complains, “I thought this was supposed to be fun.”  Elena’s other new hobby is taking off her clothes in front of everybody for shock value. Stefan suggests she occupy herself by returning to high school. Damon makes her promise not to bite anyone while she is there.

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After seeing a memorial poster for Jeremy in the school hallway, she tells Caroline (Candice Accola) that she wants to rejoin the cheerleading squad. Somehow this leads to her participating in a cheerleading competition that is seemingly the same day. Apparently being a vampire also gives you the ability to learn cheerleading routines in five minutes. Elena follows a rival cheerleader onto her bus and bites her so she can steal her hair ribbon, which as Caroline points out, totally clashes with the Mystic Falls uniforms. Caroline is pissed that she drank from the competition and that she no longer cares about doing what Damon said. Stefan theorizes that turing off her humanity turned off the bond, since her bond is based on her feelings for Damon. In other words, the rules of the sire bond continue to fluctuate. Caroline tells Elena she doesn’t want her to participate in the competition, even though being a girl short should theoretically screw up all their routines, but Elena ignores her request and marches out with the squad. Then she deliberately misses catching Caroline during a stunt.

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Steroline of Carfan?: Stefan injects Elena with vervaine to prevent her from doing anything more dastardly than humiliating someone. She wakes up at home and again starts taking off her clothes in front of Stefan. He tells her that’s Katherine’s trick. She claims that she no longer has any feelings for Stefan. Elena has texted invitations to a kegger at Casa Salvatore to every single high school student in the area. She dances on a table. Ooh, edgy! Caroline tells Stefan she thinks they should follow Elena’s example and have fun. Yes, the hints of Steroline that we have seen in previous episodes are anvils in this one. Stefan wants to dance with her. Elena does not like seeing them together. But she covers,  telling Caroline to take him out for a spin. Elena nearly attacks Sheriff Forbes when she shows up to break up the party. Stefan stops Caroline from attacking Elena. That gives Elena the opportunity to flee, which Stefan realizes was her plan all along.

Klaley or Haus?: At a truck stop, Klaus (Joseph Morgan)  mauls a vampire who attacks Hayley (Phoebe Tomkin). Damon later asks Klaus to help him find Katherine. He wants the cure so he can give it to Elena, thereby protecting klaus from having it forced on him. Klaus tells him about the dead vampire at the truck stop. When Damon goes there, he finds Rebekah (Claire Holt), who also wants to find Katherine because she will wants to be a human.  She has a vial of Klaus’s blood to save the vampire who was mauled. The vampire in question turns out to be Damon’s his old friend Will. Instead of saving him, Damon rips out his heart claiming he was too far gone to recover.

A revived Hayley tells Klaus that she made a deal with Katherine to find her birth parents. He says he can protect her. Klaus admits he really just wants Tyler to live in constant fear. He is not all that motivated to kill him. She tells him she knows who helped Katherine. They flirt a bit, then have passionate sex.  He notices a birthmark on her back, which he tells her is from a wolf clan in Louisiana that she will only meet if she participates in a spin-off called ‘The Originals.”

Road Trip: Caroline tracks down Elena in the woods. They have a Stefan and Damon style physical fight. Elena thinks Caroline should turn off her humanity so she won’t feel guilty about having dirty thoughts about Klaus. Stefan and Damon break them up. Stefan reminds Caroline not to take Elena’s behavior personally. Caroline points out that Elena has no motivation to come back. Stefan reminds her that Elena didn’t give up on him when he was in his ripper phase.

Elena asks Damon if he wants her to go back to being a scared little girl who didn’t know what she wants. She no longer cares how awful he he is. She wants him to admit he likes her better like this. I think Damon’s fantasy was to have moral, human Elena love him unconditionally. But the next time we see the two of them they are headed to New York City where Damon will encourage her to drink and kill Hannah Horvath. Well, not really. But that would be an amazing crossover episode.

Blood Shortage: All of the blood banks in Mystic Falls and surrounding towns have been robbed. Stefan theorizes that Silas is the culprit, because apparently witches who have been starving for thousands of years crave blood.

Matt Gets a New Crib: Caroline gets a text from Matt (Zach Roerig) telling her to meet him at the Lockwood house. She can’t enter until he invites her in. He has a package from Tyler with a letter saying that, for her safety, he will never come back and that he left Matt the deed to his house. This is pretty much the first good thing that has ever happened to Matt on this show.