With all the partisan bickering that happens in Washington, D.C. on an hourly basis, there is one issue that should unite both sides of the aisle: making George Clooney illegal. Seriously. The man is so flawless, he makes all other males on the planet seem hopeless by comparison. And something needs to be done.
As evidenced by every red carpet or talk show he’s ever been on, Clooney has an endearingly self-deprecating sense of humor. He’s gotten deeply involved in all kinds of social causes, whether it was protesting the genocide in Darfur or raising money to fight poverty. He’s extremely good at what he does for a living, usually only picking the best series (“ER”) and Oscar caliber movies (“The Descendants,” “Up In the Air”). And, yes, there’s that whole matter of possessing the sort of good looks that attract women the way Lindsay Lohan attracts “TMZ” reporters.
So clearly, there should at least be a congressional committee formed to look into some sort of ban to keep Clooney from shaming the rest of us. And as further evidence of the man’s irresistible charm, inhuman intellect and scary sex appeal, look no further than these movies and TV appearances.
Speaking of being so charming that it’s criminal, here is Exhibit A. Clooney starred in this remake of a ‘60s Rat Pack romp about a clever heist in Las Vegas, and the role was tailor made for him (hence the two sequels). As he buddies around with the likes of Brad Pitt, Matt Damon and Julia Roberts, getting into and out of trouble courtesy of that smile that melts glaciers, you’d swear this is more a documentary than an action comedy.
It’s not enough that Clooney has to be the world’s handsomest actor. He’s got to show off by writing and directing an Academy Award-nominated movie as well. Clooney didn’t take a lead role in this examination of journalist Edward R. Murrow’s (David Straitharn) battles with Communist-baiting Sen. Joseph McCarthy (the film used archival footage of the real man). Instead, he played Murrow’s producer, Fred Friendly. Proving yet another virtue the man seems to have…..he’s willing to give others the spotlight, and Straitharn responded by getting an Oscar nomination. (Although to be fair, Clooney got one for directing too.)
Clooney didn’t win the Academy Award for “Good Night,” but he did take a Best Supporting Actor trophy home. And as is almost always the case (we’ll pretend that “Batman & Robin” never happened), he showed good judgment with the projects he picks. This thought-provoking film weaved together several stories to examine the powerful and problematic influence the oil industry has over government. Not a happy film, but another good one for the Clooney resume.
Not all of Clooney’s movies have been big hits, but that doesn’t make them any less intriguing. Take this 1999 satire, starring Clooney, Mark Wahlberg and Ice Cube. It was directed by regular Oscar nominee David O. Russell, and was as diverse a movie as Clooney has ever made. It’s a war film, set in the aftermath of the first Gulf War. It’s an adventure flick, as Clooney and company try to get away with a cache of stolen gold. It’s a political film, taking a long, hard look at how the U.S. dealt with Iraqi rebels trying to topple Saddam Hussein after the war ended. “Three Kings” defied description, which made it a tough sell at the box office, but it’s one of Clooney’s best and most underrated movies.
All this, and a willingness to get soaked in fake blood while performing a monologue that includes live liver surgery too. What more do you want in a human? Back when he was still a kindly and compassionate “ER” doc, Clooney hosted this “Saturday Night Live” that was filled with doctor jokes. It’s well worth taking another look at this episode, first and foremost for the “ER” parody called “WR” (for “Waiting Room”). Plus, it’s encouraging to notice that there’s not a grey hair on Clooney’s head so you can take comfort in the fact that the man has indeed aged over the years (although he’s even done that gracefully).