Was Thursday night’s “X Factor” a results show or an ongoing commercial for One Direction? The show opened with Simon Cowell’s “X Factor UK” brainchild band singing “Live While We’re Young,” which then moved into a long conversation about NFL player Drew Brees and how he did a Pepsi commercial with One Direction. And then they cut to commercial and it was that very Pepsi commercial, and playing in the background was “Live While We’re Young.” Whoa! And then I fell down the rabbit hole.
There was a quick spat of safety announcements for a handful of contestants—in no particular order, they remind us several times—and then, guess what. A video about One Direction! With lots of statistics that try to convince us of their importance! First UK band to have a #1 album in the US! Two platinum albums! Simon Cowell is so bloody brilliant!
And then they sang again. They sounded so British in this song “Little Things,” a treacly ballad. One of them even sang the words “cuppa tea.”
But I guess that was it for them. Much as I found them intrusive on our results show, by the end of the night I was wishing for more. Anything to fill the voids of silence at the end when Mario Lopez and Khloe Kardashian very slowly and awkwardly tried to announce the ranking order of the remaining 12 contestants. (The 13th, Jason Brock, was sent home, no surprises there.)
It is cool, I’ll give them that, that we get to know the actual order of popularity on one of these singing shows. It lends accountability, provided we can trust the source of this information, but assuming we can, it’s nice to know this stuff.
So here’s how they stand.
1. Tate Stevens
2. Carly Rose Sonenclar
3. Vino Alan
4. Diamond White
5. Fifth Harmony
7. Jennel Garcia
8. Paige Thomas
9. Lyric 145
10. Beatrice Miller
11. Arin Ray
12. CeCe Frey
Mario and Khloe both failed at delivering this on multiple levels, like when they showed Beatrice’s face for a really long time before announcing she was in 10th place, and worst of all when they got down to the top two and started to reveal, “In first place…” Long silence. “Actually we’re going to do second place.”
As for the bottom two, it was between Jason and CeCe Frey, and both sang for their lives. The judges couldn’t come to a consensus about who to send home. LA Reid obviously chose CeCe and Demi Lovato obviously chose Jason. Britney Spears made no hesitation when she said she’d send CeCe home. But Simon chose Jason, putting the result into deadlock. Having to then go with America’s real vote, it was Jason on the chopping block. CeCe fake cried. Again. Hate. Her.