This week, I lost patience with the Kalinda Has Hate Sex With Her Ex storyline. It had nothing to do with anything else that happened in the episode, and seems like another show entirely. It’s probably a show I would watch, because I like dark and borderline smutty soaps, but it isn’t “The Good Wife.” In fact, it undercut an otherwise thoroughly entertaining episode.
A reporter, Mandy (Miriam Shor, which is funny because she is replacing her former co-star Kristen Chenoweth’s character), wants to interview Alicia (Julianna Margulies) and Will (Josh Charles). She admits she has information that they had an affair. Eli (Alan Cumming) asks Alicia about her relationship with Will. Mandy claims to have the hotel receipt. Alicia refuses to tell Eli how long their affair lasted. Alicia asks Will if they were together September 30. Will has no idea. Eli tells Alicia he got Mandy to back off, thus ending a potentially explosive story that would have revisited a relationship that many viewers, myself included, felt had an abrupt, unsatisfying ending. After talking to Will, Alicia wonders what Mandy’s actual agenda was. Eli admits the real, far less interesting rumor is that Peter slept with a campaign worker. Kalinda (Archie Panjabi) pretends to be an assistant and gets Mandy to reveal the details about which room and which hotel. She won’t reveal who the campaign worker was. Peter tells Alicia the rumors are false. Alicia says she doesn’t give a damn, Rhett Butler style. Kalinda has her suspicions about a pretty blonde. Peter is surprised she is helping him, which arouses Eli’s suspicions. The campaign worker tells Kalinda she had sex with Peter eight times and that Alicia saw her, but that it was no big deal because Alicia said they had an open marriage. Kalinda realizes she is a lying fame whore. Eli asks Alicia if she and Peter have an open marriage, Alicia cracks up. Then she goes home and kisses Peter. Nothing brings a separated couple together like competing rumors of scandalous affairs. Click the impage below to watch the smooch from the episode and decide whether Alicia and Peter should have a real marriage again.
This week’s’ Kalinda and Nick (Marc Warren) kinky sex scene: he smashes eggs on her shirt, they pull knives on each other. Kalinda goes to bed with one of her FBI agent lover Lana (Jill Flint), in a sex scene worthy of “The L Word” and ignores Nick’s call.When she leaves, Nick is across the street, like the villain in a Lifetime movie. Kalinda finds Nick drinking with Lana. He calls Kalinda a dyke. She decks him. He again tells Kalinda that she belongs to him, which is getting boring. Kalinda tells him her girlfriend is a federal agent.
The case of the week involves a search engine, Chum Hum, that is manipulating search results. Yes, Neil Gross (Benjamin Hickey) is back. A software company is suing because Chum Hum bumped them down after they refused a buy out offer. Neil offers them a small settlement. His lawyer,Viola, (Rita Wilson), tries to get Clark to negotiate. Will subpoenas the engine’s algorithm. The ancient, hard of hearing judge who is surprisingly tech savvy sides with Will. Will reveals that he knows Neil bought their competitor. Diane confronts Clark (Nathan Lane) about talking to Viola. He reveals that he is pretending to agree with Viola to help Lockhart-Gardner. Viola introduces a college president who claims that the software belongs to the university. The judge doesn’t buy it and insists on the algorithm, saying he will assign a third party to look at the it. Neil claims first amendment privilege. Alicia disproves his argument. Viola offers Clark a million dollar settlement. He tells her to negotiate with Will. Neil hires the owners to run their competitor’s company that he owns, thereby screwing Lockhart-Gardner out of a settlement.