Catherine Hickland Returning to “One Life To Live”
This makes up for the unwelcome return of the Morasco sisters. Catherine Hickland, AKA Lindsay Rappaport, is returning to “One Life To Live.” The actress took to Twitter to share the good news, writing “Ok, are you sitting down? OLTL has asked me to bring Miss Lindsay Rappaport to the dance B4 the end. I said YES.” Troublemaker Lindsay left Llanview in 2008 when she was convicted of murdering the dastardly Spencer Truman. Given that at the moment half of Llanview is getting away with murder, it seems likely that Lindsay could either be paroled, or encounter another character in prison.
Hickland’s return is somewhat surprising because the actress has been an outspoken critic of ABC, blasting ABC Daytime President Brian Frons for canceling OLTL and “All My Children.” Apparently, he is not holding a grudge. Since leaving OLTL, Hickland has, oddly enough, become a “comedy hypnotist.” Hickland would certainly be a welcome addition to the on-line version of OLTL.
Stories So Nice, They’re Doing Them Twice
Dear Soaps, I humbly request that you cease the practice of telling the same story with two different sets of characters simultaneously. There are multiple current offenders on this one. “General Hospital” has Crazy Lisa (Brianna Brown) plotting violent revenge on the residents of Port Charles at the same time that Psycho Franco is plotting violent revenge on the residents of Port Charles. “The Young & the Restless” has the never ending criminal investigation of Skye’s death at the same time as the interminable investigation of Diane’s death. “One Life To Live” has three stories involving siblings who have altered their appearance with plastic surgery (Victor/Todd, Cutter/Kim, Gigi/Stacy), two of which involve one sibling impersonating the other and amnesia. I know there are allegedly only seven plots in all of literature, but that leaves six more for you to mine at at any given time. It is both sloppy storytelling and monotonous to watch. Inevitably, soaps pick the most ludicrous plotlines to duplicate. No headwriters seem motivated to craft two compelling love triangles or two interesting family dramas at the same time.
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The Y&R dual murder plots are particularly galling because it seems like they are both dragging on forever because the writers have lost interest. In the time that Sharon (Sharon Case) has been in prison for what the audience know is an accidental death or “death,” Amanda Knox and The West Memphis Three have been released. Yes, those sagas of wrongful conviction began years ago, but this is soap time. Kids age overnight. Trials that would last for months in the real world are over in a couple days. A storyline about a woman who fell into a volcano is not the proper vehicle to attempt an accurate portrayal of the slowly turning wheels of justice, particularly because a competent lawyer ought to be able to get the case dismissed in about five minutes by pointing out that Skye’s body was never found and that the woman has a history of faking her death. It makes me dream of a crossover with “The Good Wife.” Any of the Lockhart-Gardner attorneys could get an acquittal in their sleep and Kalinda would have retrieved the camera memory card that has footage that clears Sharon within 24 hours. (How has FBI agent Ronan (Jeff Branson), who appeared to fish it out of the river because he thought it might be relevant to Diane’s murder, not bothered to look at it yet?) It does not seem like it would have been that difficult to write a script where Sharon was freed before the Diane was particularly since the show has not bothered to write a storyline about Sharon being locked up. All she does is sit in the visitor’s room. Diane’s murder similarly only seems to be mentioned about once a week after much ado was made about everyone in Genoa City being a suspect.
Since the only things that happen on GH these days involve violence, it is not surprising that there would be two storylines involving psychos. I suppose I should be pleased that Lisa is actually interacting with other characters instead of just appearing in pre-taped scenes that consist of her mumbling to herself and throwing objects on a canvas. And, *spoiler alert* Lisa is supposed to die in a few days, because why go through all the trouble of reviving a character from a coma if you aren’t just going to kill her off in a few episodes?
I suspect the horrendous retconned “Gigi is alive after all even though she not only died on camera but had her heart donated to another character,” happened out of some misguided belief that Rex and Gigi need to end the show’s ABC run living happily ever after. I wish they had inserted footage of Whoopi Goldberg in “Soapdish” screaming, “He doesn’t have a head!,” because this is the same scenario. But really, they are not one of the show’s A-list couples. Their fans accepted Gigi’s death as a good soap tragedy that generated a lot of interesting story. Her death actually meant something. Her resurrection just a few months later lacks the impact of all of the happy character returns at the end of “All My Children’s” ABC run. Having it happen at the same time as the awesome but equally far-fetched Todd storyline tilts the show so far in the direction of camp that it makes it difficult to take anything that happens on the show seriously.