The tension has been been building since season one. Last night ”True Blood’s” Eric (Alexander Skarsgard) and Sookie (Anna Paquin) finally had sex. It was sensual, romantic and very, very naked. Eric even escaped death row to be with Sookie. Yes, everything got crazy when the full moon rose over Bon Temps.
The episode begins where last week’s ended. Sookie and Eric’s kiss quickly turns into a full on make out session. He takes off his ridiculous sleeveless hoodie. Bill (Stephen Moyer), now aware of Eric’s whereabouts thanks to Pam (Kristin Bauer), bursts through Sookie’s front door to interrupt them. This is the first of several daytime soap opera tropes employed in the episode. Bill and Eric get into a full on, fangs out, brawl. Eric is about to kill Bill with a fireplace poker when Sookie, who despite all her protests seems to like having men fight over her, tells Eric that Bill is his king. AmnesiEric drops the poker and bows down to him. Bill’s minions handcuff him and drag him away.
Sookie rushed over to the king’s house to plead Eric’s case. Bill claims that Eric is both a danger to others because he is under Marnie’ spell, and a master manipulator. Sookie points out that Bill is being less than objective about the situation. He orders his men to arrest her for trespassing if she returns.
WATCH “I WISH I WAS THE MOON” HERE.
Eric is thrown in a cell with melted-face Pam. She tells him that he hates Bill and needs to snap out of his Forrest Gump phase. Eric does not want to remember his life as a badass.
Bill gets a warrant to sentence Eric to the True Death. Eric says he doesn’t expect any mercy. He has nothing to say in his defense, because he thinks the vampire he used to be was despicable. He just requests that Bill release Pam and pass on a message to Sookie. “I was born the night she found me. Because of her I went to my True Death knowing what it means to love.” Aww. AmnesiEric could have a great career writing vampire Hallmark cards. He tells Bill that he hopes Bill and Sookie find their way back to each other after his death. The big question is whether Eric is being sincere or whether Pam coached him on how to give Bill a massive guilt trip. Either way, it works. Bill can’t bring himself to kill sweet, puppy dog Eric.
Eric finds Sookie wandering in the woods, while Bill mopes alone. Eric tells Sookie that his life has been spared. Eric and Sookie totally do it right there, outside, on the ground. It is literally dirty, dirty sex. If you are a fan of Alexander Skarsgard‘s butt, this is a scene worth watching multiple times. So much of it is shown that it deserves its own guest star credit.
In other Bon Temps happenings, Jason (Ryan Kwanten) fails to turn into a werepanther during the full moon. Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll) helps him come to terms with the fact that he is still an ordinary human being. So what was the point of him spending multiple episodes strapped to a bed, being molested by werepanthers? Will he have to raise a litter of werepanther babies? Alcide (Joe Manganiello) and Debbie (Brit Morgan) join the Bon Temps wolf pack. Tommy (Marshall Allman) shapeshifts into Sam (Sam Trammell), fires Sookie for never showing up to work (ha!) and has sex with Sam’s girlfriend. Unwitting sex with a double is Daytime Soap Trope number two. Tommy then either dies or lapses into unconsciousness. Tara’s (Rutina Wesley) girlfriend forgives her for lying about every single aspect of her life including her name. All is good until an angry Pam decides to attack them. Arlene (Carrie Preston) and Terry’s (Todd Lowe) evil baby and its evil doll sets their house on fire. Jesus (Kevin Alejandro) kills a rattlesnake, which his grandfather then brings back to life. It bits Jesus on the neck. Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) recites an invocation that saves him. It’s all connected to Marnie (Fiona Shaw), who summons the spirit of the witch from the Inquisition. Luis, who was a vampire priest back in the day, goes to her cell. She makes him bow down to her.