There are Fun Fights and then there are Freak Fights. Unfortunately, on last night’s “Real Housewives of New York City,” we got both. Oh, it would’ve been fabulous if the episode merely consisted of: Cindy giving the elitist Sonja the smackdown (we like to refer it as the “souk-down”) of her life; Sonja erratically crying over being a camel psychic; and LuAnn getting whiplash from her testy, seizure-ridden desert friend…(but then again, whiplash requires one to actually have a neck). BAM, I said it!
But no matter. The night didn’t end that way. Just when we were busy laughing our bandonka donks off, we suddenly found ourselves having to deal with a painstaking Freak Fight, thanks to Jill Z. and Miss Ramotional.
Watch Part Of Their Fight Below:
If you’re kind of masochistic like that, feel free to re-live the over-the-top affair that’s been boiling for over a year between the Blondie and Red:
Dressed in a neon cantaloupe cleavage-baring number, Ramona and her emerging Crazy Eyes invite Jill to come into her bling’d out room. Armed with her war paint (a.k.a. Eygptian eyeliner), the red-head is mad as hell and ready to rumble.
“I feel that you’re two-faced to me,” starts Ramona. She then mentions specific comments that Jill had said behind her back that were hurtful—but Jill’s not having any of it. Scowling with all her might, her Botox serum is about to burst out of her forehead.
“Don’t just hold me accountable…oh, I own it,” retorts the Lawwng Islander. “You don’t think you’ve ever said anything negative about anybody in the world?!”
“I tell it to their face,” declares Ramona. [Crazy Eyes and big hair in full effect.]
Suddenly, Jill loses all control: She goes on a tirade about how much she resents Ramona for not supporting her last year when she made a surprise trip to the blond’s island excursion to make-up with Bethenny.
“You’re not listening to meee!” screams Ramona as she grabs Jill’s arms and shakes them. Unfortunately, the two frenemies commence with their verbal diarrhea.
“I came to apologize [on the island)—how dare you throw me out!” Jill howls. “Until you say to me ‘I’m sorry,’ we can never be friends!!!” (She dramatizes her hissy fit by moving her arms like a pair of dancing scissors.) “It’s not about you—it’s how I feel!” she declares.
“She’s upset that she never made up with Bethenny,” reveals Ramona to the camera in a rare, emotionally accurate moment.
Although Ramona tries at various points to keep things cool and “constructive” (albeit one can interpret this as another way of her trying to dominate the situation), Jill refuses to play nice. She storms out of the room in her six-inch heels and mutters: “Total f–king denial. I’m done.”
“Why didn’t she hear me?” whimpers the Ramona Coaster as she collapses on the bed, shaking in tears, as we’re forced to come face-to-face with her glowing armpit.
We’ll say this: Cindy was right to be totally peeved—nobody’s listening to each other.