‘One Life’s Ted King Gets Artsy; Y&R is in a Hurry

by | January 12, 2011 at 12:13 PM | Deep Soap

Ted King’s Character Gets A First Name

Former ‘General Hospital‘ star Ted King will arrive in Llanview on January 21st.  According to TVGuide, he will be playing an artist named Tomas who painted the portrait of Blair that was in Eli’s mysterious lock box.  As eagle eyed fans noticed, the painting was of Blair (Kassie DePaiva) at her “golden balloon” wedding to Todd back when he was played by Roger Howarth. Is it a red herring, or an implication that the Trevor St. John version is an impostor?  The article teases that the show is keeping Tomas’s last name a secret because he has a connection to someone in Llanview.  As long as he isn’t a Ford or a Salinger, I’ll be happy.

Slow Down, Baby

The Young & the Restless‘ is rushing their latest stolen baby storyline like the show is about to end.  I can imagine Y&R’s creator, Bill Bell, watching the show from heaven and screaming about all the missed emotional beats.  As much as I dislike that Billy (Billy Miller) and Victoria (Amelia Heinle) are determined to have a baby less than six months after getting married, if that’s what their story is going to be, than tell it from beginning to end.   In the golden era of soaps, the couple would have spent several months attempting fertility treatments.  In fact, it’s baffling given that Victoria’s problem is carrying a baby to term, not conceiving, that they would not hire a surrogate.  The expense certainly would not be an issue.  I assume that the only reason they aren’t is because Y&R did a surrogacy storyline last year when Mac (Clementine Ford) carried Lily (Christel Khalil) and Cane’s (Daniel Goddard) twins.  Billy and Victoria should have attempted legal adoption, which, again, should have been as easy for them as it is for Brangelina given their net worth.  Then, after they suffered a couple of heartbreaking losses — they plan to adopt a baby from a teen Mom who changes her mind and decides to raise it, they travel to a foreign country to adopt a baby from an orphanage, only to find that they are disqualified as potential adoptive parents because of their multiple divorces — I would believe that Billy was desperate enough to buy a baby.   Then, I would feel sympathy for his plight.

Watch a Sneak Peek at ‘The Young and the Restless:’

Instead, Billy bought what the audience knows is Daisy’s (Yvonne Zima) baby in less time than it takes real people to buy a new refrigerator.  Billy asked Rafe how to acquire a baby right away.  The previously upstanding attorney immediately referred him to a sketchy middle man, not an adoption attorney.

Meanwhile, Daisy’s baby was stolen from its safe haven in a church by a poor rube who brought him home to his wife, Agnes.  (We know he is low class because he has a tub of KFC in his living room.)  Then, a few scenes later he was selling the baby to second generation baby broker Primrose Deville (Ellen Greene). Seeing the ubertalented Melissa Hayden make the most of her tiny role has been the highlight of this story.  She has wordlessly conveyed that she is under her husband’s thumb and desperately wanted to keep the baby for herself.  The Daytime Emmy winner who seemingly dropped off the face of the earth after leaving ‘Guiding Light’ should be playing major roles.  Here’s hoping this is the beginning of a comeback for her. I would like to think that she was cast in part as a nod to the GL storyline in which she played a teenager who agreed to give her baby to a woman who was faking her pregnancy.

Unfortunately, unless Agnes ends up tracking the baby down and telling Victoria that her newborn was stolen from a church, we won’t see any more of her.  After about five minutes of soul searching, Billy is ready to plunk down two million dollars — ten times what it would take to arrange a legal private adoption — for the baby.  Six months of story has been compressed into six unsatisfying episodes.

Unsolved Daytime Mysteries

1. Why did Noah come back to Genoa City on ‘The Young & the Restless?  The Newman heir returned to town as a young adult.  He made a couple of mysterious phone calls in his first few episodes.  He bonded with Devon (Bryton James) over their interest in music.  Then he went AWOL.  He should be heavily involved in all of the Newman family drama, with Victor (Eric Braeden) angling to curry favor with one of his few blood relatives who does not despise him, and his parents custody battle over his little sister. Why bother to bring the character back if he isn’t going to have a storyline? It’s possible that Noah’s story has been delayed because Luke Kleintank booked a recurring role on ‘No Ordinary Family.’ But, if they were going to bring him back, the show should either have found a way for him to do double duty or cast an actor who could commit to Y&R full time.

2. Is Lucky (Jonathan Jackson) ever going to learn that he is Aiden’s father on ‘General Hospital‘?  This is the biggest dropped storyline in daytime right now.  The stage was set for paternity drama, with Helena switching the paternity test to make it look like Nik (Tyler Christopher) was the father so that she could have the pleasure of watching a Spencer be raised as a Cassadine.  Then Franco came to town, and Becky Herbst went on maternity leave, and the show just seemed to forget all about the story.

3. How did Jessica (Bree Williamson) and Natalie (Melissa Archer) give birth to twenty pound preemies on ‘One Life To Live‘?  After days of dialogue about how it was too soon for either of them to deliver their babies, and how underdeveloped their lungs would be, it was hilarious that the show cast babies that look to be several months old.  No wonder they did not need to be placed in an incubator.  They were too big to fit.