The ‘Entourage’ Guide on How to Make It in Hollywood

by | June 5, 2010 at 11:30 AM | Entourage, HBO, Special Features

(HBO)

(HBO)

If it’s getting warmer outside, then it must be time for ‘Entourage.’ The HBO hit has become a summer staple and heads into its seventh go-around at the end of June with a slew of famous guests in tow – from Jessica Simpson to Mike Tyson to even porn actress Sasha Grey (who has a multi-episode arc as Vincent Chase’s new girlfriend). You’d be forgiven for not remembering where things left off last year – for one, Eric and Sloan are engaged – but some good news if you have: Comcast HBO subscribers can watch all six seasons here at Fancast throughout June … for free! Still, in an effort to get you caught up on the series as a whole, here are 10 ways ‘Entourage’ has taught us how to make it big in Hollywood.

Step 1: Quit your job at Sbarro
While Vincent Chase (Adrien Griener) is the star on ‘Entourage,’ Eric Murphy (Kevin Connolly) is the star of ‘Entourage.’ He’s the audience surrogate leading us through the madness of Hollywood. He’s also a former manager at Sbarro – a fast food Italian restaurant that he tries to purport as something bigger. The lesson? Flipping pizza can lead to Hollywood parties … just so long as your childhood best friend is a movie star. Companion Episode: S1, Ep1: ‘The Pilot.’

Step 2: Calves are important
Looking great is part of Hollywood culture. And that normally means Botox, face-lifts and the occasional liposuction. But don’t sleep on your lower body. By which we mean your calves. Yes, calves. Just ask Johnny Drama (Kevin Dillon). Or, better yet, don’t. Companion Episode: S2, Ep4: ‘An Offer Refused.’

Step 3: Hone your video game skills
Every entourage needs that guy who loves playing video games, smoking illegal substances and hitting on girls. On ‘Entourage,’ that’s Turtle (Jerry Ferrara), a man so good at playing video games that he entered an xBox contest once. Never mind that he lost to a little kid. Companion Episode: S2, Ep6: ‘Chinatown.

Step 4: Avoid the Valley unless high school parties are involved
You might not know this, but apparently the San Fernando Valley is persona non grata in Los Angeles. Especially if you’re Johnny Drama and you need to get yourself to an audition. Still, if you find yourself there – like Vince and Eric did during the opening weekend of ‘Aquaman’ – make sure to crash a high school pool party, because nothing will make you feel cooler than spending some time with people who idolize you. See also: Almost Famous. Companion Episode: S3, Ep2: ‘One Day in the Valley.’

Step 5: Don’t partake in threesomes
Poor Eric learned this the hard way when he fell into bed with his girlfriend Sloan and her girl friend. But you should know better: That kind of Hollywood lifestyle choice is for movie stars, not managers. Companion Episode: S3, Ep6: ‘Three’s Company.

Preview ‘Entourage’s Seventh Season:

Step 6: Stay away from Seth Green
As it turns out, the funny man from ‘Austin Powers’ rolls with a posse that isn’t afraid to throw down fists. You were warned. Companion Episode: S3, Ep9: ‘Vegas Baby, Vegas.’

Step 7: Listen to your agent
You have an agent for a reason. And when someone as ostensibly successful as Ari Gold (Jeremy Piven) tells you not to make a fools errand like ‘Medellin’ – think: ‘Apocalypse Nowmixed with ‘Scarface‘ mixed with extra helpings of badness – you should listen. Companion Episode: S4, Ep1: ‘Welcome to the Jungle.’

Step 8: Kanye West is your friend
On the way to the Cannes Film Festival and missed your flight? No problem! The chances are good that Kanye West has his private jet available for you to use and he’s totally cool with letting you hitch a ride. Because, sure thing.  Companion Episode: S4, Ep11: ‘No Cannes Do.’

Step 9: Always remember, everything is great
Even when their careers hit rock-bottom – like Vince getting fired from his comeback movie and ending up back at his mom’s house in Queens – nothing ever really bad happens to the guys on ‘Entourage.’ Why? Because they all have a que sera sera attitude about life. And it normally pans out – as in, Vince ends up getting the Martin Scorsese movie he’s always wanted. Companion Episode: S5, Ep12: ‘Return to Queens Blvd.

Step 10: No seriously, everything is great
Don’t believe us? Just take a peak at this episode, which finds Eric getting a big time job with a management company right when he needs it most. Also, Turtle plays golf with Tom Brady. And dates Jamie Lynn-Sigler. Only in Hollywood. Companion Episode: S6, Ep5: ‘Fore!