Nadum’s Nine – TV Gals

by | September 27, 2007 at 10:22 AM | General

Mary-Louise Parker

Crush-worthy TV Gals
The fall season. That time of year when males everywhere adjust the hierarchy of their unrealistic romantic goals, infatuations and crushes. But why go through the painstaking research yourself? That’s what ‘Nadum’s Nine’ is for.

While the criteria for the list isn’t any particular formula, given that I’m a shallow male with nothing to offer society but my excellent taste in television, aesthetic appeal is a big factor. At the same time, the characters they play on television — and how well they play them — also factors in. A TV Gal can be beautiful, but if she’s playing a sourpuss — and badly… well let’s just say she won’t be visiting your dreams.

9. Jenna Fischer – Pam (The Office)
How can you not love Pam? She’s charming, cute and has a great sense of humor. Her biggest handicap is that she’s not only in love with Jim, but was engaged to Roy for two seasons.

8. Julia Louis-Dreyfus – Christine (The New Adventures of Old Christine)
Growing up watching her on Seinfeld, every male in their mid-twenties to early-thirties developed the inevitable crush on Elaine. Now she’s back, looking better than ever and adorning outfits that don’t look like they came from the Salvation Army.

7. Adrianne Palicki – Tyra (Friday Night Lights)

She’s the “bad girl” of the list, but plays it with an alluring vulnerability that keeps her from being unappealing. On the downside, her family is a mess and she’s mentally scarred. The family reunions and holidays would not be pleasant affairs.

6. Tina Fey – Liz Lemon (30 Rock)
Liz Lemon has the big time “cute factor” going on. She’s got a great sense of humor, she’s smart as a whip and has an obliviousness to the conventions of society that give her an intangible appeal. And she’s clumsy, which is kind of adorable.

5. Kaitlin Olson – Sweet Dee (It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia)
Sweet Dee, Sweet Dee. She might not the possess the most conventional beauty, but her personality is a big time bonus. Of all the TV Gals on the list, no one would be more fun to hang out with. Heck, her three best friends are the crudest males in America and she still manages to fit in.

4. Sarah Jessica Parker – Carrie Bradshaw (Sex and the City: The Movie)

She’s not on television now, but she’s shooting The Sex and the City movie, so according to my guidelines, she’s eligible. It may be nostalgia, it may be that she’s a writer and it may be that she’s the best dressed gal on the list, but Carrie Bradshaw is one lovably dainty gal.

3. Kristen Bell – Elle (Heroes)
Since next to nothing is known about her character on Heroes, Kristen’s inclusion is based on her real life persona and the fact she’s drop-dead gorgeous. She brings charm to any role she touches (including a cut throat hustler on Deadwood) and that’s a rare feat.

2. Ali Larter – Niki Sanders (Heroes)
Genetic perfection in all its glory. That is Ali Larter. Whether she’s playing her evil (but well meaning) alter-ego Jessica or the sweet and loving single mother Niki, Ali has the unique ability to bring two distinctive types of hot to the table.

1. Mary-Louise Parker – Nancy Botwin (Weeds)
Does anything need to be said? In life, certain people have the “it” factor. Michael Jordan had “it”. Tiger Woods has “it”. Roger Federer has “it”. You can’t pinpoint just what makes them so great, but their superiority is unquestionable. Mary-Louise has an enchanting face, an a delightful disposition and an exquisite smile. With all respect to Condoleezza Rice, Mary-Louise Parker isn’t just the most crush-worthy gal on television, she’s the biggest catch in all the world.